Almost 15 months since our everyday lives and normals changed with COVID-19, I have personally found comfort in reflection. Reflection on the loss, tragedy, transitions, adjustments, opportunity, technological advancements, awareness and so much more to so many. This year has impacted the way we live, love and persevere through difficult times. It’s tested our resilience and ability to grow both personally and professionally. As restrictions are easing here in the states, again there is an adjustment to the next phase of our new normal. For me like many, it’s stirred up a variety of emotions but ironically, the two that stick out the most are excitement and anxiety. Interestingly enough, it’s an intertwined excitement and anxiety about the same thing: moving forward with life and our day to day routines. I’ve had friends, family, colleagues and patients share similar emotions. Embracing remote work and being re-introduced to office life, becoming more comfortable with the idea of socializing after several months of quarantine and isolation, pressures to perform and reacclimatize to the lives we lived pre pandemic times when we may not feel ready. It hasn’t been easy, but I wanted to share two simple things I’ve adapted into my life over the year.
Boundaries and balance. Finding that intermediate in our personal and professional lives can be tricky at times, but I’ve found that exercising boundaries and balance personally and professionally has helped ease some of the anxiety. As humans, we are constantly placing pressure on ourselves to perform, to support, to do, to be. Sometimes we forget to take the time to stop and listen to what our minds and bodies need in the present moment. Personally, the challenges this year posed on staying socially connected while remaining isolated helped put into perspective which relationships were truly worth prioritizing during and post pandemic times. Also, allowing myself to sit and be with my thoughts on days I didn’t feel like following my routine helped me accept that it was okay as a perfectionist to not be perfect. To instead embrace my flaws and welcome them as part of my journey. I am thankful for the opportunity to focus on new hobbies and passions but I am most thankful for the time to pause and reflect on what is truly important in life. As we move forward in the pandemic, learning the power of “no” and exercising boundaries as we reemerge socially is okay, in fact it’s something I find healthy. Over the years, I have increasingly become a proponent of disconnecting from anything or anyone that contributes stress in life. The same applies professionally. With the busy demands of work and adjustments to new normals, placing healthy boundaries when not working helps maintain a healthy work life balance. I always encourage my patients (although I do admit I am guilty of not always applying this to myself) to set aside a time after which to disconnect to the best of their ability from anything that may cause distraction or stress, ie. work emails, news outlets, social media etc. As most of my friends know, I’m an advocate for keeping social media apps deleted from my phone and downloading when wanting to use them. I used to think that I may miss out on important “life updates” from my close circle but I know that if it’s truly something important, they will text or call me. That constant pressure to stay connected and tendencies to compare our lives to one another can be an unhealthy dynamic. I’ve found that creating these boundaries not only helps alleviate anxiety but helps promote a healthy balance. I am also a proponent of setting aside a “designated worry time” for those people that have difficulty in disconnecting personally and/or professionally. I describe this as a ten minute period of time prior to bed that allows you to ponder on whatever may be causing you anxiety at the moment whether it be work related or not. After that time, doing the best to detach from those worries/triggers and embracing bedtime with an open heart and clear mind set. Again, this may not always feasible for every single person every single day, but may help in some capacity to promote optimal mental health and wellness.
I will be the first to admit that I am a work in progress and still struggle on many days to find that healthy balance. But I am here to share that after these last 15 months, it’s okay to take things at your own pace and reemerge when you feel ready despite what others around you may be doing. Take the time to do things that feel good and spend time with people that make you feel good. Don’t waste your time or energy on things that compromise your boundaries and balance. Most importantly, don’t be afraid to say no and remember to trust your intuition at all costs.
